Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Brodeur For NYC Mayor

Christopher X. Brodeur is a democrat running for mayor of New York. I've yet to see his name in a Bloomberg ad and he only snags media coverage when he's kicked out of parties at Gracie Mansion and when he ran for mayor in 1997 with a bag over his head, but he has a website and that's good enough to get some coverage from me.

Mr. Brodeur is running as a democrat, which is not saying much since polls show that all but one of the front runners are getting beat by a Republican among democrat voters.

Freddy Ferrer wants to raise taxes by $900,000,000; Brodeur has less lofty goals in mind. On his website, Brodeur lists 100 Innovations he would bring to the office of mayor. Among them are:
- Free Subways
- Bathroom Doors must open OUT not IN
- Teach NYC some manners
- Sell Gracie Mansion
- Legalize gambling and prostitution
- All Tech Support must be free
- Investigate why Ticketmaster charges a $6 service fee
- Fine criminals with the money going to victims
- Ban 4-legged tables (3-legged ones don't wobble)
- Move the Yankees to Jersey
- No more umbrellas
- He wants to phase out the penny but also wants more penny trays (flip-flopper)

He backs up all his ideas with a plan, but I'm not sure teaching New Yorkers "manners" will get him elected. New Yorkers would rather pay a billion dollars in new taxes or even vote for a Republican than learn to smile for a yokel from Alabama blocking a street corner in Times Square with 8 kids wearing "I ♥ NY" shirts while slowly unfolding one of the huge NYC subway maps. Will you just get on the freaking 1-train like I told you to do in the first place!