Thursday, July 13, 2006

Emails from John Kerry: Profiles in Sadomasochism

I signed up for emails from John Kerry and quickly found out that it was the best thing I have ever done. Ever! John Kerry emails provide the humor I need to get through my day. John Kerry is freakin' awesome.

However, I think John Kerry is a closeted Sadomasochist. Let me explain.

November 16, 2005 - I get an email from Kerry detailing 4 Democratic leaders who are influencing the debate about America's future in Iraq. Those 4 "democratic leaders": John Kerry, John Edwards, Tom Daschle, and Patrick Leahy. Less than a year prior, 3/4th of this group lost elections, rejected by the American people.

January 13, 2006 - A fund-raising email from John Kerry details how he failed to block nominations of Clarence Thomas, Samuel Alito, and John Roberts to the Supreme Court. The tone of the email went like this: We fought...we lost, send money.

July 13, 2006 - Kerry sent out another fundraising appeal to highlight a year's worth of losses for himself and the Democrats. Which is pretty hard considering how hard the Republicans in Washington are working to lose in 2006.

Someone who wants to know what our johnkerry.com online community fights for will take a look at what you've done and they'll see something powerful.

They'll see that the hundreds of thousands of johnkerry.com activists who called for a filibuster of the Alito nomination were right. Right about what kind of Justice he will turn out to be -- and right that we need Justices who will protect the constitutional rights of Americans.

Alito was sworn in as the 110th Supreme Court Justice on January 31, 2006.

They'll see that the nearly 300,000 people who acted in support of a deadline for withdrawing troops from Iraq and the Kerry-Feingold Amendment were right. Right to insist on a change of course in the Bush administration's failed policies and right to keep the pressure on until the future of Iraq is where it belongs -- in the hands of the Iraqi people.

The Senate voted 83-13 to reject the Kerry-Feingold Amendment.

They'll see that the more than a quarter of a million people who have joined Maria Cantwell and me in defending the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge acted because we had to draw a line of protection around this precious natural heritage, and we had to promote an energy policy worthy of America so we never go to war for oil.

On March 15, 2005, the US Senate rejected Maria Cantwell's amendment, allowing for drilling in ANWR.

Just to prove that he loves to call out disappointmen, check out the request Kerry makes to his "netroots of despair".

Our most crucial work is still ahead of us. We'll have to pour everything we've got into the last four months of these critical 2006 elections. But, today, all I'm asking you to do is stop and reflect on what we've done together already.
Seriously, John Kerry needs help before he attempts Self-Flagellation and sends out an email to tell everyone about it.



Previous
Emails from John Kerry: False Claims
Emails from John Kerry: You're Not Invited!
I donated $200 to HillaryClinton.com and all I got was this lousy t-shirt!
John Kerry: Losing Firm
Losers of the world unite!
Kerry for Ferrer
Socialism 101