Tin Hat Tuesday

It has been awhile since I have pulled out my trusty tin hat and dove into a little conspiracy theorem. I pulled the following story from a news source you can find on Google News, which passed over site earlier this year. I guess stories on chemtrails and government cover-ups are more newsworthy than posts on Jack Bauer.

Conspiracy Planet posts a story written by Tom Flocco which claims the plane flown into the Pentagon on 9/11 was not a 757 as reported, but a Cold War era Douglas A-3 Skywarrior as part of the plan to send us off to war. The Skywarrior was first flown in 1953 and served in Vietnam; the last of the 282 Skywarriors built were retired in 1991. Like the A-3; Douglas is not around anymore as it was bought by McDonell, which was then bought by Boeing (who makes the 757). See how it is all connected?


Douglas A-3 Skywarrior

I have a couple of questions about this claim:
1) What happened to Barbara Olson and the others who died on 9/11 aboard American Airlines Flight 77?
2) Why did the government (who has thousands of planes at their disposal) choose an aged bomber which has been out of production since the Kennedy administration? Wouldn't an old warplane draw unwanted attention? I guess Elvis was more comfortable flying the A-3 than a more modern airplane.

(Source - Conspiracy Planet)

Muslims Gone Wild

"Extra Crispy anyone?"

This week's case of muslims gone wild involves Shiites, KFC, and al-Quida.

An al-Qaida-linked suicide bomber blew himself up in a Shiite mosque in Pakistan. What do the Shiites do? They burn down the local KFC killing 6 employees who had nothing to do with the bombing. The mob also attacked a hospital, two gas stations, and a dozen cars that also had nothing to do with the original bombing.

Shiite mobs often target symbols of U.S. influence after sectarian attacks as they accuse the government of failing to act to prevent religious violence.

The attack on the KFC outlet came just minutes after the attack on the Karachi mosque- CNN

I just don't get it.

Craigslist Bust

An aspiring drug dealer was arrested for selling crystal meth via the classified section on Craigslist to undercover cops. The dealer used code words for meth "Tina" and snorting coke "ski" and sold to the cops three times before being finally arrested.

In other Craigslist news, here's someone looking to buy "half-eaten fruit". I'm not sure if it's slang for drugs or just gross.

(Source - NY1)

Jones Beach Air Show Continued

These were all taken at the Jones Beach Air Show. Click on the pictures for a larger view.

A P-47 and B-17 at Republic Airport prior to the Air Show

Army Golden Knight Parachute Team

F-15 and F-86

T-86 Texans (WWII Trainer)

Red Barron Stunt Team

USAF Thunderbirds

USAF Thunderbirds - Jones Beach Air Show

Click on the images for a larger view.

These pictures were taken at the Jones Beach Air Show on Saturday (5/28). The show included parachute drops by the US Army Golden Knights, an F-15, an F-18, the Red Barron stunt team, and of course, The Air Force Thunderbirds. I will post more pictures later, so check back. The Thunderbirds put on an amazing show and will be at Jones Beach again on Sunday.

Also, I have a few small video clips of the F-15 and The Thunderbirds, but I don't know how to to post them online. Please help by posting how to do this in the comments section or email me.

Weekend Photoshop/Caption Contest

Meet The Moron Caption Contest

Winner - Slant Point

Photoshop Entries

"Tim I can juggle these all day, just try me."
- The Man
"MM dunnnt nmmmoo wiii deh muhzzzluhhhd mmm"
-Slant Point
- The Man

Previous Contests
One Uncomfortable Moment
Caption The Irrelevancy
Dark Side Caption Contest
Tuesdays With Kim
Caption Bush
Star Wars Contest
John Kerry Is...
Caption Clinton

18

A 39 year old man got out of his car in Richmond Hill and became the 18th person to be killed by a hit-n-run driver on the streets of New York this year. Anthony Ferrisi was run down by an 83 year old granny who had no idea she had hit anything.

Other Links
Death Race 2005: NYC

BREAKING NEWS

Operation Tennessee Waltz
Four Tennessee Legislators came to work on Capitol Hill in Nashville and left in handcuffs.

"It doesn't surprise me. It would be hard to believe that it was limited to one body (Ford)...that kind of conduct has no place around here." - Rep. Frank Buck, D-Dowelltown

The four were arrested after sponsoring a bill which would have allowed electronic recycling companies to contract with the state to dispose of surplus state computer equipment not claimed by school districts. Undercover agents posed as a company (E-Cycle Management, inc.) looking to benefit from crooked politicans. The lawmakers took the bait and began extorting money from the agents, even issuing death threats. The four are accused of violating the Hobbs Act which deals with extortion by the wrongful use of actual or threatened force, violence, or fear. Ford is also accused of counts of attempting to intimidate a witness. He faces up to 40 years in prision.

Tennessee politicians have been busy working to tighten ethical rules, due to the exposure of Senator John Ford's unethical dealings with lobbyists and special interest groups. Senator John Ford's nephew, Rep. Harold Ford Jr. just announced that he's running for the Senate seat to be vacated by Bill Frist.

"Government is not for sale" - U.S. Attorney Terrell Harris

Update: Senator Ford threatened to kill an undercover FBI agent. Pages 9, 10, and 11 of his indictment detail the threats Ford made.

(click for a larger view)

Update: 3 more arrested! Former lawmakers Roscoe Dixon, Barry Myers and Charles Love were arrested. Love is a Hamilton County School Board member. An eighth person has yet to be arrested.

Update: Blogger/bad speller/pol also known as Rep. Stacey Campfield thinks the first wave of arrests are just "the tip of the iceberg". Rumors are flying around on who is going to go next.

Update: Ford resigns after arrest.


Kathryn Bowers, John Ford,
Chris Newton, Ward Crutchfield

Arrested (click on names for charges):
Sen. John Ford, (D) Memphis - $55,000 in illegal payments
Sen. Ward Crutchfield, (D) Chattanooga - $12,000
Sen. Kathryn Bowers, (D) Memphis - $11,500
Rep. Chris Newton, (R) Cleveland - $4,500
Roscoe Dixon, (D) Memphis - $9,500
Barry Myers
Charles Love

(Sources - WBIR - Tennessean - Newschannel 5 - WSMV)

Other Links
Posts on Sen. John Ford: Who's Your Daddy and Who's Your Daddy: Part 2
WBIR has video of the press conference
Bill Hobbs
NashvilleFiles
Nashville Is Talking
Pith in the Wind
Doug Petch
One Hand Clapping
Scared Monkeys
The Pulse Blog
No Quarters
Rex Blog
Right Justified
Six Meat Buffet
Camp4U
Captain's Quarters
Michelle Malkin
Outside The Beltway
Ankle Biting Pundits

Death Race 2005: NYC

Hit-n-Run drivers claimed their 17th victim on the streets of New York in the early morning hours Wednesday. The latest victim was a 20 year old college student just crossing the street, listening to his iPod. Other victims include a 26 year old mother and her 2 year old daughter. They were struck in Queens by a green van with a custom-made chrome grille and gold wheels with a gold stripe down the side.

Are there any Death Race 2000 fans out there? Should I stick to Jack Bauer references before digging into my knowledge of B-movies?

Death Race 2000 is a film made in 1975 about the year 2000 and the national obsession with a NASCAR-like event called Death Race. The race crosses the country and drivers score points by taking out pedestrians, higher points are awarded for babies and senior citizens. Yes, the movie is as absurd as it sounds.

Other Links
Pull out of Philly Now
OTB notes that the Northeast is home to the worst drivers

Moral Retard: Part 2

Professor Timothy Shortell may need to find a new place to spread his message of religious intolerance and bigotry. Brooklyn College President Christoph Kimmich stated "I sharply disagree with the offensive anti-religion opinions of Prof. Timothy Shortell" as BC officials have started an investigation into Shortell's rants.

Shortell responded to the uproar surrounding his comments by calling himself and people who think like him "Übermenschen", which is Nietzsche's idea of a perfect person...a "superman". Personally, I think he is a "Dummkopf".



(Source - NY Daily News)

Darwin Alert

Courtney Hall II walked into a Greenbriar (TN) store, intent on robbing the clerk. Fortunately for our gene pool, this dim-witted perp chose to rob a store named Guns & Leather Store. You can guess what happened next. Regardless what the Bible thumpers in Georgia think, evolution happens.

(Source - Tennessean)

Jawa lists a couple of Darwin Award winners.

One Uncomfortable Moment

Tuesday Caption Contest

Winner - Thank you for coming sir, the custodial room is towards the back - Chaim

Previous Contests
Caption The Irrelevancy
Dark Side Caption Contest
Tuesdays With Kim
Caption Bush
Star Wars Contest
John Kerry Is...
Caption Clinton

(Linked on OTB)

Kerry Signs Form 180: Part 2

Yes, John Kerry was for signing the SF-180 form, before he was against it.

I wonder what caused him to finally release all of his medical records. Could it have been the Urgent Grams that hundreds of bloggers sent to Bill Frist via johnkerry.com?

Flashback: I broke the story of John Kerry signing his SF-180 back on April 1st.



Other Links
Decision08 wants to start a new clock
Myopic Zeal is skeptical
Brainster
Tennessee Rants
Slant Point

I Like Mike

The 2001 mayoral election went off as New York dug out from the destruction of September 11th. As a testament to the strength of this city, 8 weeks after the terrorist attacks New York elected Mike Bloomberg as 108th mayor of New York City.

Bloomberg was a billionaire business mogul who took over a city scarred by 9/11 and facing a fiscal nightmare, even before the attacks. From the ashes Bloomberg began to make the hard decisions that needed to be made. They were decisions which a career politician would have flinched at. Bloomberg showed that he was going to steer the city back, no matter what the polls said. His popularity rating was at the lowest, when he was working the hardest. It has been a tough 4 years and Bloomberg has brought New York back.

While the Yanks have not won a World Series while he has been in office, Bloomy still gets my endorsement for Mayor in 2005.

After the Republican Primary, I will generate a "Blogs for Bloomberg" Blogroll. If you would like your blog to be listed, post a comment or send me an email.

Mike Bloomberg for NYC
If you would like to volunteer for Bloomberg's campaign, click here.

24 Blogging

The fourth season of 24 comes to a close tonight and I will not be able to watch it! From the hours of 6pm to 9pm, I will be playing softball. Please post comments below as the show goes on and I will follow up once I finish watching the taped show.

My Final 24 Predictions

Deaths - Last week, I predicted 6 deaths and there were 6 deaths. For the final two hours, I predict 12 deaths.

Missile - Jack hacks into the flight computer of the nuke and steers it clear of the East coast and harmlessly into the Atlantic. I would've had him steer it into Fenway Park, but I don't work at Fox.

Audrey - She would be really shallow if she refuses to take Jack back. He only killed her husband and almost tortured her brother.

Jack - Saves the day (again); comes back for season 5.

Marwan - Finally gets killed by Jack.

Tony - He is so Dead, thanks to Michelle's sappy send-off. "The kiss of death" as one of my friends called it.

China - Former President Palmer calms them down with a great quote on some car insurance.

Chloe and Edgar - End up working together instead of bickering and actually get something accomplished for once. In the end, they will suppress their love for each other in order to help Jack hack into the missile and save the day. They are a perfect pair: Edgar's mom is still dead and he's fat, Chloe like killing.

Curtis - ACLU demands that Curtis be arrested for his torturing of anyone he can get his hands on. Ironically, the ACLU uses torture to get him to confess and he cries like a baby.

The NY Post has published a 24 drinking game in today's edition. Drink each time Jack says one of these:
"You're going to have to trust me"
"Who are you working for"
"We're running out of time"
"Secure the perimeter"
"I'm going in"

Previous 24 Posts
4-5:00am
24 Glossary
3-4:00 am
Jack Bauer Appreciation Day
2 - 3:0 am
1-2:00 am
12 - 1:00am
Jack bags a liberal
Worst Job at CTU
Worst Job: Part 2
Jack Bauer is a sissy
Google Search

Moral Retard

What do you do with a college professor who describes religious devout as "moral retards" and who publicly claims that religion is "sanctimonious nonsense"?

At Brooklyn College you would promote them to the head of the Sociology department, despite outrage caused by the professor's comments. Professor Timothy Shortell's promotion to chairman of the sociology department has many students upset. A college spokesperson stated there was nothing the school could do as the promotion was the result of an election inside his department.

(Source - NY Daily News)

Other Links
Shortell's blog
NY Sun piece
Michelle Malkin checks in

Trump U

Trump University , no kidding.

Caption The Irrelevancy

Pretty in Pink Caption Contest

Winner - Democrats are obviously not filibustering lunch. - The Man

Second Place - Did you see that Saddam underwear pic? oooooweeeee! Butcher of Baghdad? More like the Sultan of Studville! Mamacita! - Wilderness Fox

Honorable Mention - I gotta give up drinking -- I'm seeing a pink ele-phant - Don Suber

Photoshop Entries

- The Man

Previous Contests
Dark Side Caption Contest
Tuesdays With Kim
Caption Bush
Star Wars Contest
John Kerry Is...
Just One Minuteman
Caption Clinton

Butcher of Sagdad?

My fiancé and I finally agreed on something political! We both agree that Saddam should have been spared the indignity of showing up on the front cover of major newspapers in his underwear. We also agree that Saddam is one hairy bastard.

What do you think? How will the "Arab street" react?

Post a comment and vote on the poll below.

Was the Sun & NY Post wrong to show Saddam in his tightie-whities?
	Yes
	No
Free polls from Pollhost.com

Housing Boom

Need any proof that house prices are a little crazy in the New York area?

Click on the image for the full listing.


Want more room? Check this one out.

Train Wreck Alert: Dean on Meet The Press

Meet The Press - 9am EST - NBC

Sunday morning political talk shows are boring, loud, and obnoxious. I would rather watch old ladies selling magnetic turquoise bracelets on HSN than to watch that yard gnome looking Stephanopoulos drivel on like a stuck turkey.

This weekend there is reason to tune in on Sunday to Meet The Press. Howard Dean, the savior of the Democratic Party will ooze into a live national TV interview for the first time since being elected to head the DNC further into oblivion. So far, Dean has done a bang-up job. For the first quarter of 2004 Democrats raised a whopping $13 million dollars. While that's impressive, it is still 146% less than the GOP raised ($32 million).

One GOP fundraiser brings in more money than all of Dems Q1 efforts.

Take time to send a question to Meet the Press by clicking here.


Other links
Welcome Ankle Biting Pundit readers
Robert Novak ho-slaps Dean
Wuzzadem sends his regards to Meet The Pr**k
GOP Bloggers notes a Dem "oops"

Gone Fishing With Karl Rove

I was fishing at the DU last night and was entertained by the DUers who were claiming Karl Rove was the architect of the Newsweek mess. According to the Tin-hat Rove-Haters Club, KKKarl also organized the protests in the Middle East and planted signs like these in his spare time.

Now I am not one to, you know, believe anything on the DU so I did a little research on my own. My jaw hit the floor when I uncovered the picture below that proves the DU was right. Not only was Karl Rove behind the Newsweek mess, he actually participated in the protests that followed.

Could Karl Rove behind the Democratic Underground as well?


(linked on OTB)

Henry Hudson Collapse: Part 2

On Monday, I posted some pictures here of the retaining wall collapse on the Henry Hudson Parkway taken by a friend of mine in the DOT. The Henry Hudson was closed Thursday afternoon as crews worked all night and had the road open for the Friday morning rush.

Here are some recent pictures of the area, click on the image for a larger view.

The Voodoo You Do

Got Chicken? The Dutch Reformed Church in Belleville, New Jersey has seen a rash of pagan rituals on their grounds. I guess it's a good reason the Belleville Police Department employs one of the foremost experts on the occult, Officer Paul Long. You gotta love Jersey.

(Source - NorthJersey.com)

Stand Up For Principle Contest

Bill Frist and the Republicans in Washington seem determined to prove how much they care about their own political power . . . and how little they care about using power to fight for what really matters to America's families. Tell Frist about what really matters to you. Make sure Washington stands up for the needs and interests of America’s families. - John Kerry.com

John Kerry is urging people to send an "Urgent Gram" to Bill Frist about "what really matters to you" on his website. Well, I sent the one below and I encourage you to take Mr. Kerry up on his offer and tell Bill Frist what you really think.

Click Here to send an Urgent Gram. When you are done, post your Urgent Gram message in the comments section or email me.

Note: This is not to be confused with an "urgent gram" requested by Marion Berry.

Winner(s) - Each and every one of the comments that mentioned Kerry not signing SF-180, which were 11 of 27 comments on this site and many others on numerous right-leaning blogs.

Honorable Mention -

-Please dock Senator Kerry for all the time he missed last year. My boss doesn't pay me to search for a new job and neither should his - Andy inNY

-Please vote for judicial filibusters, before you vote against them. - Teve Torbes

To Dr. Frist,Please feel free to remind John Kerry that he LOST the election. Nuke the bastards! - Von Aras

Other JohnKerry.com Posts
John Kerry USA Today Ad
John Kerry Is....

Dem Chairman Caught in Porn Sting

What were the Metro Police and the FBI doing at the Davidson County Democratic Headquarters last week and what did they find?

Davidson County (Nashville) Democratic Party Chairman Rodney Mullins resigned under allegations he possessed child pornography. Mullins has not been arrested, yet. Mullins was also the Tennessee Coordinator for Howard Dean's failed campaign in 2004.

Here is "Rod's" Yahoo Profile.

The Davidson County Democrats website is down, here is cached version. Check it out, dinner with the Breck Boy only $150, sign me up.

(Hat Tip - Nashville Truth)

Other Links
Tennessean
News Channel 5
Nashville Files

Holy Shiite

Possibly the funniest NY Post cover, ever.

24 Live Blogging

24 Live Blogging Here starting at 9:00pm EST

4:00
$20 says the nuke is heading toward the east coast.
Once again, we have an ex-president in control of the country. Asked if we should start evacuating, he states we should wait to see what Bauer does. Great.
Corporate sponsor plug: Dell...Cisco...Ford..Allstate

4:10
1 - Random Backup Agent
2 - Random Backup Agent
3 - Bad Guy
4 - Bad Guy
What...All of a sudden Jack cannot hit a moving SUV from 100 yards with a pistol?
No car, bad guys shooting at him, it should take Jack 5 minutes to get back to CTU (6 if he stops at Burger King.

Jack kills his girlfriend's husband, now is going to torture her brother.

No car, no problem it took Jack 8 minutes to get back to CTU after terrorists blew up one car and stole the other. Go-Go-Gadget Jet Pack!

Is Don Ashton (Speaker of the House) the only politician on this show who thinks with an actual brain? He must be a Republican.

Allstate Plug
Did anyone notice the subtle Allstate plug. When asked if President Logan had things under control, Mike responded "he is in good hands" or something to that effect. Allstate's slogan: "you are in good hands with Allstate". $25 says there is an Allstate commercial this break.

4:25
Let the torturing begin!

Kids, you do drugs and you end up strapped to a chair at CTU with your father yelling at you and Jack waiting to break.....wwwwhhhhat Heller is gay. Kids, if you are gay, come out before you end up crying in a chair at CTU and for God's sake, don't do drugs.

So some terrorist had to sleep with the Secretary of Defense's son? Why, so they could make a phone call from his phone? Confusion is setting in.

AHH AN ALLSTATE COMMERCIAL. Remember, you are in good hands....

4:40
New York might be toast, Michelle and Tony have to make out. Sweet.

Jack goes from CTU, into a helicopter, and across LA in 6 minutes.

4:47
5 - Bi-sexual Bad Guy

4:56
6 - Random Backup Agent

Summary: Missile is still in the air, Heller's gay, Tony's a hostage, Marwan escaped

Next week: Jack might have to shoot Tony, 2 hour season finale

MSM Roundup

This weeks case of journalistic plagiarism brought to you by Detroit Free Press columnist Mitch Albom.

The report cites one case, where Albom ironically steals a quote for a story about Jayson Blair.

In one example cited by the Free Press, Albom used a quote from a New York Observer interview with Jayson Blair, a New York Times reporter found to have plagiarized or fabricated elements of dozens of stories. In the May 2003 interview, Blair said: "So Jayson Blair the human being could live, Jayson Blair the journalist had to die."

Albom is the author of the best-selling books "Tuesdays With Morrie" and "The Five People You Meet in Heaven".

(Source - Yahoo)

24 Blogging

Live Blogging 24 tonight

Last Monday was deemed Jack Bauer Appreciation Day to honor all that Jack does for us. For those of you (my fiancé included) who have no idea what I am talking about on my long, rambling 24 posts, here's a quick glossary of the show:

Jack Bauer - Ruthless anti-terror agent who has saved the "day" in each of the previous 3 seasons. He is a random mix of MacGyver and the A-team. Before he was a CTU agent, Jack was a vampire in the movie The Lost Boys.
CTU - Counter Terrorism Unit. A top-secret group who hires cut-throat agents and cuts corners in HR as they have hired a number of terrorist moles each season.
Torture - Typical way CTU extracts information from bad guys, good guys, innocent civilians, and fellow agents. Not at all ethical, it is also not been effective. See Also, finger-bending
Curtis Manning - Agent at CTU who does a good job backing up Jack, sucks at torture
Preident Logan - Vice president who takes over from the time Air Force One is shot down and up until ex-President Palmer shows up.
David Palmer - Former president who retired and is now doing Allstate commercials. Currently he is acting like the president and still is doing Allstate commercials on the side.
Mike Novick - Dick Cheney impersonator, also acts as Chief of Staff
Tony Almeida/Michelle Dessler/Bill Buchanan - Useless love triangle
James Heller - Secretary of Defense, was kidnapped early on in the show.
Richard Heller - Sec. Heller's son, tortured to see if he was involved in his father's kidnapping, soon to be tortured again. When not at CTU or Starbucks, James also appears on The OC
Audrey Heller Raines - Sec. Heller's daughter, wife of Paul Raines, love interest of Jack until he kills Paul
Paul Raines - British guy married to Audrey, later was "Terri Schivoed" by Jack
Habib Marwan - Typical muslim bad guy, trying to nuke America
Chloe O'Brian - Longtime nerdy/bitchy analyst at CTU, recently promoted to stone-cold killer
Finger-bending - Jack Bauer's patented technique used to extract information. To try at home simply bend your finger back so that your index finger nail touches your wrist, repeat with middle finger.
Edgar Stiles - Fat guy at CTU, collects Star Wars figures and stalks Chloe

Last week I predicted 4 deaths (1 off the show's actual total). This week, I predict that 6 deaths during this episode.

Anyone who is interested in live-blogging the show with me is welcome to do so, check back at 9pm EST and post comments as the show goes on. The past two weeks RTFR has live blogged the show with me.

Previous 24 Posts
3-4:00 am
Jack Bauer Appreciation Day
2 - 3:0 am
1-2:00 am
12 - 1:00am
Jack bags a liberal
Worst Job at CTU
Worst Job: Part 2
Jack Bauer is a sissy
Google Search

Henry Hudson Collapse

If you followed the local news last week, a portion of an old retaining wall collapsed on Thursday, covering portions of the Henry Hudson Parkway with tons of rock and dirt. Luckily no one was hurt or killed in the collapse. Click here for more on the story.

The images below come from a friend of mine who works with the DOT and took these on site. As you can see, it could have been much worse.

Click on the images for a larger view.


Looking upward at the wall. This site used to be an old castle that looked out onto the Hudson. The wall was built almost 100 years ago. There are cars underneath that rubble.

Henry Hudson Parkway - facing northbound center and right lane with debris from wall.

Here is the roadway, facing north later in the day. Debris has been removed.

Newsweak: DU Reaction

The DU'ers must be really upset that another smear against the United States and our soldiers has been literally been flushed out as a lie. Let's check out some of the DU's response to the Newsweek matter with a top 10 list.

Top 10 Democratic Underground Responses to Swirlie-gate:

Ahh those "people of faith"
10 so hundreds or thousands of religious loonies injured, perhaps hundreds dead, all because of newsweek and its phony articles + religious fundies obscene adherence to their beliefs?

9 I smell some strong-arm tactics having been practiced on Newsweek

8 They are "Rather-izing" Newsweek. More evidence of the corrupting influence of this evil administration.

You knew the someone was just wetting themselves to write this one:
7 So they admit to just making it up? Just like the war drive, huh?

6 Too little and too late, I am glad this s**t has blown up in Bush's face. The Newsweek story has put in jeopardy a handful of despotic regimes that have sided with Bush. Let them all fall!

5 I think, what they are REALLY saying is, "We're sorry we caused so much trouble, by reporting what happened."

It's a good thing Newsweek was not around in 1914, Bush and Rove were probably behind it anyway.
4 Archduke Franz Ferdinand may not have been assassinated! WWI prevented. All is well.

3 If I were interrogating someone of faith, I would've torn apart the bible, koran, or anything else they 'believed' in right in front of their faces. It's a f**king book. One of millions of copies. F**king deal with it.

2 The spin comes at us faster than ...a Koran flushing down a toilet.

You might have been asking when Karl Rove will be blamed for this? I give you the top DU response (so far) to Swirlie-gate.
1 We need to write to newsweek and ask if Rove got to them.

I know fishing at the DU is easy, go ahead and find some more statements and post them in the comments section.

Newsweak Flushed

Swirlie-gate?
It will be a rough week for Newsweek, the blog-mob will have their sights set on that rag for their sloppy reporting. This is just another sad case of crap-journalism.

The recent cases of the MSM being exposed for being nothing but a bunch of idiots with a press pass have got me thinking. How long has this been going on, unchecked? It has been painfully clear over the past few months that some journalists in today's media are being exposed as liars and plagiarist all too frequently.

The recent case of Newsweek laying a big turd on the world with its story of the flushing ability of a US Army standard issue toilet could have led to a worldwide war against the United States by the billion Muslims who were told that American soldiers flush their holy books down the toilets. If a US Army toilet can flush the Quran down the toilet, then why have the inmates not tried flushing themselves down as well, that's a strong toilet? Back to my main point, that false story could have led to more than a few deadly uprisings in Afghanistan. This rage could have spread to Iraq and even America itself.

Newsweek lit a fuse with a faulty match and we are lucky that they did not pull a "Rather" and try to salvage the story until it was way too late. Lets just hope that the people who have risen up in the Middle East will accept this and understand that our media makes mistakes. Too many people have been killed due to this error.

Dark Side Caption Contest

Weekend Dark Side Caption Contest

Winner - What's a lightsaber doing in my pocket? Oh . . . never mind. - Shawn

Second Place - "Are those cod-pieces... customized?" - RFTR

Honorable Mention -
Newsweek reported that Star Trek fans violated a Yoda doll leading to massive protests from Star Wars fans, further flaming the already tense Star Trek - Star Wars fued. - The Man

"I bent my Wookie!" - Shawn

Photoshop entries

- The Man

The hostages are the best part of this job
- RFTR

Previous Contests
Tuesdays With Kim
Caption Bush
Star Wars Contest
John Kerry Is...
Just One Minuteman
Caption Clinton

Linked at OTB

OTB Caption Contest

Over at Outside The Beltway:
First: The Man - One of these two is a relic of a failed system, the other is missing a nose.

The Parable of Jesus and the DMV

When the Son of Man has problems at the DMV, you know someone's going to pay.

Jesus Christ has hired a lawyer in an attempt to obtain a legal driver's license in the state of West Virginia. Peter Robert Phillips Junior has been going by the name Jesus Christ for 15 years, without proper legal approval. Regardless, "JC" already has a passport, Social Security card and Washington DC driver's license under his adopted name.

A judge in Washington denied his attempt at a legal name change, stating that it might offend people. An appeals court has ordered the lower court to hold more hearings into the matter.

You could do so much with this story, joke wise. Post comments/jokes below.

(Source - WABC NY)

NY Dems Court Repeat Sex Offender Vote

With many sexual predators being let out of jail only to strike again, Republican District Attorney Jeanine Pirro took a stand to put these criminals behind locked doors so they will not have a chance strike again. The New York Senate passed a bill 58-2 which would lock up a violent sexual predator in a mental health facility after they are finished with their time in prison if experts find the predator is likely to strike again.

"Make no mistake. These people are coming out, and they're walking freely among us," - Republican DA Jeanine Pirro

Thousands of petitions were delivered to members of the Senate and Assembly urging them to vote for the Civil Commitment of Sexually Violent Predators bill. While the Republican controlled Senate passed the bill, Democrats in the Assembly took a absurd stand with the sexual predators claiming the bill "is nothing more than a smoke screen that is intended to make the Assembly Democrats look soft on crime," according to Peter Rivera (D-Bronx). Following Pierro's press conference, where she slammed the Democrat's inaction, Assembly Speaker Sheldon Silver (D-Manhattan), called for public hearings on the idea of civil confinement.

Slant Point notes the AP's bias on display in it's headline.

UN Watch

With all the suffering in the world (some at the hands of the UN), it is good to see the United Nations is out there protecting www.morganfreeman.com. Now if they can just do something about that "genocide" in the Sudan.

Other Links
Michelle Malkin links to the UN getting into a Blog War

Anti-Shrubbery Exclusive

EXCLUSIVE

Following the attack on the plants in front of the British Consulate in New York last week, the same terrorist group attempted a grenade attack on another bush this week.

Knowing that I was on the front lines of the first attack, the group responsible for these events (ASS) contacted me. I was sent this email shortly after the latest incident. These guys hate shrubbery with a passion.



Other Links
Wizbang goes DU fishing
CY has another theory
Linked at OTB

Carnival of the Vanities - 138th Installment

The 138th Carnival of the Vanities is being hosted by Cynical Nation.

I submitted my post: Top 5 comments Bush did not make while in Georgia

PETA Kills Animals

The next time you hear about PETA activists preaching the evils of fish, chicken, meat, milk, fur, pets, and anything non-vegan...remember that between 1998 and 2003 they took in 10,000 dogs, cats, and other pets and killed 78%, 85% in 2003.

Their hypocrisy will be on display in Times Square during the month of May with a large billboard.



PETA Kills Animals

Click here to help raise more funds to expose PETA

PETA billboard equates feeding children meat and child abuse

PETA links Holocaust to eating meat

(Hat Tip - Slant Point)
Michelle Malkin posts a blurb on this group

Evil Bert

The NY Post's Sean Delonas puts out some of the best political cartoons. His cartoons are in your face, but some of the greatest aspects of his works are the subtle details he adds in. Last week I could not help but notice Evil Bert appeared in one of his cartoons. When he draws Bill Clinton, if you look hard enough, there is usually a scantly clad chicken somewhere in the scene.

Evil Bert showed up on GOP and the City site in this post.

Tuesdays With Kim Caption Contest

Caption/Photoshop Contest
1) Caption or photoshop these North Korean kids
2) Email me photoshop entries, post captions below
3) Deadline - Friday the 13th



Photoshop entries

- The Man

Finally, schools teaching something useful for once.
- The Man

- Paladin

Previous Contests
Caption Bush
Click Here to cast your vote for the best DU T-shirt design
Star Wars Contest
John Kerry Is...
Just One Minuteman
Caption Clinton
Giuliana Sgrena Photoshop Contest
Caption Dean

Other Links
(Linked on BTJ at OTB)
Malkin has a caption

24 Recap: 3:00 - 4:00

Apparently RTFR and I have found a hole in fabric of the hit TV show 24. Not only does Jack posses the ability to talk on his cell phone for 8 hours and not lose a single call or charge the battery (he obviously does not have Sprint), but he also has superhuman speed.

If Jack was soley blessed with superhuman speed, then the show would amount to nothing more than regular episodes where Jack changes clothes on the fly, gets to locations in amazing speed, and disposes of bad guys with ease. All that would be missing is a cape and laser beams coming out of his eyes. No, everyone on 24 has superhuman speed.

The biggest abuser of the superhuman speed is ex-President Palmer, who is now acting like the real president by starting a war with China and then telling informing the real President, who was only the Vice President until Air Force One was shot down by a stolen F-117 Stealth fighter. President Palmer used his speed to go from watching Fox News at home, to becoming acting president in less than 13 minutes. In the past few hours though, he has been on overdrive because he also does Allstate commercials on the side. This is one busy guy: he is waging war with China, trying to find a missing nuke, and has time to warn us about chop shops and what Allstate is doing to combat them.

The second biggest abuser is Jack Bauer. In this week's episode he was rushing back to CTU and made it there in less than 5 minutes, changed into a suit (complete with a Windsor knot), and brushed up on terrorism threats against Chinese embassies abroad in order to come up with an alibi for CTU's panty raid of the Chinese consulate. So at 3:41am, Jack was busy talking to a Chinese investigator (still in a suit) and at 3:51am, Jack was getting his men into position to raid Marwan's hideout. In that 10 minute span, Jack changed out of his suit, dressed for battle, drove across LA, and got into position. RTFR noted that "Have you ever driven in LA? It takes ten minutes to go 3 and a half blocks, yet they regularly cross the city in 10-15 minutes".

The final abuser I will mention is the Chinese investigator. He is not so quick when it comes to seeing that CTU agents are a bunch of lying hacks, but he can drive to CTU from the Chinese consulate in less than 5 minutes. Back to CTU, these people are supposed to protect us but they cannot hire non-moles and can only come up with the "Jack was doing data entry" alibi?

One person that does not use superhuman speed often is Edgar. I see him only using the skill to take the last doughnut from the cafeteria and to use the bathroom.

Next week: The missile is in the air, where it lands nobody cares. Heller's son is back and the last time we saw him, the hippie was being tortured by Curtis. Curtis used the Pink Floyd Laser Light Show treatment on him which produced no results. Heller's son was immune from this technique because of the amount of bong resin accumulated in his nervous system. Jack may be called in to use his patented finger breaking technique.

24 Live Blogging

Live Blogging Here starting at 9pm EST. Post comments as the show goes on. I will try to update with posts. If not, I will summarize the show later on.

-----------
3:01 - 3:12
Jack and his Terri Schivoing of Paul Raines leads to the most uncomfortable situation ever on TV: Working with your girlfriend, which had a husband, who you just killed.
THE SAPPY MUSIC HAS TO STOP!
CTU is looking for groups that have attacked Chinese embassies abroad....do they forget that we attacked a Chinese embassy under President Clinton?
So the Chinese consulate leaves their windows unlocked and is easy to break into....but they have state-of-the art cameras.

3:16
Howard Burns, another useless CTU employee. That place hires the most imcompotent employees this side of Wal-Mart. Why do they not send Howard on a mission with Jack as his backup, see if he comes back alive.
Another first for America.... We have two acting Presidents bickering with each other over who is going to f-up the country worse.

3:29
"Michelle, I hate being without you....." Hello people we have a nuke missing and the Chinese preparing for war while Tony is thinking with his crotch. Cue the sappy music.

Those Chinese move fast, or CTU is located directly under the Chinese consulate. It took the Chinese guy under 10 minutes to get to CTU. Jack also got into a suit, tied a windsor knot, and brushed up on anti-China groups during the same time frame.

3:37
I bet Jack or Curtis would have loved to torture Mr. Li instead of using "doctors" to heal him. I think a taser to the balls would have had that terrorist singing like a little girl.
Jack is loading up the CTU strike force to kick some terrorist butt. I hope not too much butt, because I predicted only 4 deaths... Use minimum force Jack....

President Palmer is still working for Allstate while starting a war with China! He takes time away from finding a nuke, preventing war with China (or starting one, I have not figured that out yet), and still has time to warn the American people about chop shops and the rising cost of car insurance. What did this guy have for breakfast?

3:41
Jack the data processor...CTU, you have to come up with a better story than that.

President Palmer is giving orders to advise the Sec of State (Cheney look alike) to advise President Logan to give orders to CTU. Man this is confusing.

3:47
Zero Deaths so far. There will need to be 0.31 deaths a minute for me to make my prediction of 4 deaths this episode.

3:51
House has to be the the dumbest show...ever.

Here comes the assault. Let me note that Jack Bauer changed out of a suit and into battle gear then got into position, all this after driving across LA in less than 5 minutes.

1....2.....3 deaths, 1 torture scene. I was only 1 off!

3:59....
I thought Marwan shut down his computer before leaving.... anyway we have a nuke taking off heading east? Please aim at Boston. I cannot stand hearing "Boston Red Sox 2004 World Champions" anymore.

Next week: Looks like lots of shooting next week!!! Maybe torturing Heller's hippie son, again. Don't let Curtis torture him, Jack is better at it.

Bush in Georgia

"Go Braves"

When I heard about the president's destination on the news, I just cringed and imagined every "Bush is stupid" pundit joking about how the dumb shrub probably thinks he's outside Atlanta instead of Tbilisi....so I beat them to it:

Top 5 comments Bush did not make while in Georgia
5. "No wonder Jennifer Wilbanks ran away; this place sucks!"
4. "Hardly a mobile home in site, whereabouts do they film COPS?"
3. "Borscht? I thought you guys were known for peaches."
2. "I would like to thank the 1.9 million Georgians who voted for me in 2004."
1. "Frankly, Mikhael Saakashvili, I don't give a damn."

Have more? Post them in the comments section.

Update: This post made "Honorable Mention" on the Blue Monday Roundup over at Blue State Conservatives. First place went to Stop the ACLU, Second to Captain's Quarters , and third to Confederate Yankee.

Other Links
Linked at OTB
Nashville Truth notes Bush's dance
Blogs for Bush

Page Six: Clinton Tale

"And you know what? I'd do him"
-Brendan Fraser on Bill Clinton

In today's NY Post Page Six, Brendan Fraser tells a story of meeting President Clinton and having to rescue his wife from the Fondler-in-chief.

(Source - NY Post)

Jack Bauer Appreciation Day

While the chicken now has a holiday, Jack Bauer has saved the world three (going on four) times and has nothing to show for it but a lanky girlfriend (who was married to a British guy that Jack just "Terri Schivoed"). So to show thanks for all he does:

I proclaim today (May 9th): Jack Bauer Appreciation Day (from the hours of 12:00am and 11:59pm)

Last week, I live blogged and had RTFR live blogging the show with me. This week, let me know if anyone out there would like to co-live blog this week, email me or post a comment.

RTFR asked the key question last week: "Palmer is worried about the repercussions that our actions resulted in the death of a consul? What about the fact that there's been a coup and an unelected, unappointed official is running the US government?"

This week, Jack may have started a world war with China and America has two presidents running the show (one is still making Allstate commercials while directing the nation). China is upset because Jack Bauer dressed up like a ninja and used surveillance equipment from the video game Metal Gear to infiltrate the poorly guarded Chinese consulate. Jack could have lobbed a couple of grenades at the potted plants in front of the consulate to create a diversion; instead he was able to open an unlocked window to sneak in. The Chinese ambassador was killed at the consulate because he ran into a bullet that was fired by one of his own men. They are also upset because Jack called the consulate back and asked for a #14 with Wonton soup, no eggroll.

I predict 4 deaths this week
The previews last week led me to predict 17 deaths, I was 15 deaths off as only the Chinese guy and Paul "I am the Walrus" Raines died. Of course, I suck at predicting anything, I put $6 on Greater Good at the Kentucky Derby to Win-Place-Show and have nothing to show for it.

What a Loser

"The man's father is a wonderful human being...I think this guy is a loser"
Senator Harry Reid (D)

I guess Reid doesn't want Howard Dean to take lone credit for destroying the Democratic party.

Denied By Google News

I've followed the story of Jawa's delisting from Google News because of alleged "hate speech". Using my Jedi mind skills I sent Google News an email with just "add this site" in the message, with a link to GOP and the City. I was denied, it must have been my fatwa against Jack Bauer, but at least they didn't claim I was a racist.

To get around the Gestapo censors at Google, The Man will have to resort to other means.

What might you ask does Google News consider a quality news source:

Conspiracy Planet with newsworthy articles like :
Transsexual Ann Coulter Doesn't Like Sex Question
George W. Bush: First Gay President
Bush, Pope Money Laundering
Mind Altering Abilities of Chemtrails

Other Links
JackLewis notes the absurd sources for Google News
Linked on OTB's Traffic Jam...Outside the Beltway is linked on Google News

New Kerry Ad

Here is the new USA Today ad from John Kerry (who still has not signed Form SF-180):


I guess you can call this an Open Thread, post comments on what you think of this ad. The only thing I have to say is "go easy on the fonts", seriously there are 5 different font sizes in this ad and just thinking about the layout gives me a headache.

Update: I think the GOP should run this ad opposite the Dem ad. What do you think? I emailed it to Ken Mehlman (chairman of the GOP) and the co-chairman of the GOP.

Email Ken: Chairman@gop.com tell him to run this ad!


Other Links
Linked at the BTJ at OTB

Mayor Moby?

The NY Sun offers up some interesting thoughts on the New York mayoral race. As it currently stands, Mayor Bloomberg will win in a landslide thanks to the Democrats running a group of characters that are a better fir for the cast of The Surreal Life than a political campaign. The Sun looks to a surprise celebrity entry as the only way that Bloomy would face a serious challenge. (Moby, Joe Torre, and Russell Simmons to name a few)

Former front-runner Fernando "Flip Flop" Ferrer pandered to a Police union by called a Police shooting of an unarmed man, a non-crime. That started his free-fall which was deepened when he announced a plan to raise taxes by $1,000,000,000. The only way for Freddy to drop further would be to show up at Yankee stadium wearing a Red Sox cap. The others are polling way behind Bloomberg and look to not pose much of a hurdle for the Billionaire Mayor.

So we have a Republican mayor in a ultra-liberal city, who does not have the support of Republicans or liberal Democrats, and is running away with election. I love New York.


Mayor McCheese would not comment on his potential run for Mayor of New York.

Other Links
SlantPoint notes that Bloomy will not be getting the endorsement of the Conservative Party.

NYC Brit Bombing

Update: If this is just a prank, I'll wear a tin-foil cap and post the pictures on this site.

This picture from the AP shows the scene a few blocks from my office. There were two small bombs detonated in front of the British consulate in Midtown Manhattan early this morning.

There will be plenty of news coverage and analysis done on this in the next few days. My tin-hat theory is that this is could be a "test run" for a much larger act. The media is linking the explosions to the elections in the UK, but there could be something more going on and the UK elections could just be a diversion. These little bombs were not powerful enough to do any damage (minus a few windows), but their detonation set off a chain of response from the NYPD all the way up to the FBI. Any terrorist who was watching now has a blueprint or an idea how the police and feds will respond.

This morning, I came off the E train to the most impressive showing of police presence I have seen since last summer when the Citigroup building (also a few blocks away) was under lockdown following a threat. I really hope that I'm wrong about the whole "bigger act" conspiracy theory I wrote about above. Maybe I just have watched too much "24" and think that Jack Bauer is on the trail of whoever did this, most likely yelling into a cellphone and getting random backup agents killed.

Update: Where is Greenpeace? The perps attacked a sovereign plant yet the activists are silent (I guess it is too early in the morning, I will check back around noon).

Side Note: Color me paranoid, but we should also be on the alert due to the probings of hospital security in New Jersey and other parts of the country.

Update: Slate quotes me, labels me a "conservative" (I guess the shoe fits).

Breaking News: Go figure, a UN employee has been detained in connection with the UK consulate bombing. The man is a Dutch national who works as an analyst at the UN.

Other Links
Michelle Malkin
Of The Mind: Resolute
Scared Monkey
Double Toothpicks: Prank?
Slant Point
Mark Kilmer covers the election
My Pet Jawa: Terrorism
Outside The Beltway
Blogs Of War: Troubling
Irregular Times: Hype
A Small Victory had a vision
Lifelike Pundits
Command Post
Interested Participant
BlogMeister
Sundries Shack

Caption/Photoshop President Bush

--BUMPED For Weekend Use--

Macho Macho Man Caption Contest

1) Post a caption or photoshop for the image below
2) Email me photoshop entries



Photoshop Entries
(Click for a larger view)

- The Man

- The Man

- Joe Mama

- The Man

Previous Contests
Click Here to cast your vote for the best DU T-shirt design
Star Wars Contest
John Kerry Is...
Just One Minuteman
Caption Clinton
Giuliana Sgrena Photoshop Contest
Caption Dean

Other Links
Blogs For Bush details another brush with the law for Bush
Linked on OTB

Missing Yankee Caps

47,000 New York Yankee caps were stolen from a truck headed to Yankee Stadium. The caps were to be given away at Yankee stadium this weekend.

Also reported missing are the Yankee's bats and pitching, which are valued at over $200 million.
(Source - NY1)

Other Links
A Large Regular outs Gay-Rod

Generation Duuhh - Part 7

Sometimes They Come Back

In previous posts (Generation Duhh Part 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6) I highlight and mock the essays of some of today's youth. The day will soon come that these same young Einsteins will start to enter the workforce. This story comes from a former essayist who is looking for work, God help us.

Ask any office worker about some of the people who get hired at their place of business and you can tell that movies like Office Space and shows like The Office have plenty of material to work with. From my own experience, I'm trying to pick my favorite story. It is either the girl who was hired and started on a Monday then took Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday off before quitting on Friday. Then there was the guy who spent way too much time in adult chat rooms at work. The IT department got wind of it and logged into the same chat room and struck up a conversation with him. His last day in the office soon followed (no it was not me). He also told a client they had really big boobies.

Barring a wave of interest in the VHEMT (The Voluntary Human Extinction Movement), there will be plenty of stories like this to go around when Generation "Duuhhh" enters the work force. For a peek at what to expect, I offer this exclusive preview of the next wave of your co-workers. To prepare, make sure the water cooler has labels (or pictures) to distinguish between the hot and cold water.

(Click images for a larger view)

Any Farkers out there? All together now - "Duke Sucks".

Now on to the Work Experience Section, notice how the elderly are lumped together as "the geriatric set, I can almost feel the compassion.


Next comes the Leadership Experience section of the resume. They started an ESL class for the predominantly immigrant cleaning staff. The resume also states they taught English and publicized the class (I assume in Spanish).
The second leadership bullet caught my eye. The resume states they spent the summer of 2003 living as a field hand with immigrant families from Central America living in Los Angeles, including two weeks with their cleaning lady from Guatamala, resulting in the best two weeks of her life.


In the Skills section they list "Some Spanish". Why the hell were they teaching ESL if they had a just "some" skills at Spanish? I can only imagine a Duke student picking beans in LA informing another farm hand "Quiero testículos de asno" while attempting to ask for a drink of water.


Finally, check out the third "skill". Yo, word to your madre!

Perseverance

Franklin E. Carver shot himself 5 times (3 in the head and 2 in the chest), then drove 10 minutes, jumped off a bridge, and ended up drowning in the Mississippi River.

(Source - STL Today)

Italian Communist Journalist is Full of Prosciutto: Part 2

Back on March 7th, I noted the communist anti-American reporter, Giuliana Sgrena was full of prosciutto for claiming that New York's own, Fighting 69th were trying to kill her. Then on March 29th, Naomi Klein gave an interview where she speaks for Ms. Sgrena and restates that the Americans were trying to kill her, but that she could not back up those claims.

Fast forward to the present, both American and the Italian version of the incident report blames breakdowns in communication and lack of experience led to the accident. Both reports state that American soldiers were not trying to kill the reporter. Sgrena also claimed that 300 rounds were fired; she was 289 rounds off because only 11 rounds were fired.

The media were quick to line up and point fingers at the American soldiers with front page stories on the targeting of reporters. Where do they stand now? I like picking on AM New York, a free paper printed by Newsday. The story of the report is on Page 7, no longer front page news.

24 Blogging

Live Blogging - (24 @ 9pm EST- FOX)

Tonight Jack dresses like a ninja and starts a war with China. I will be adding up the body count as I post during each commercial break. I predict 17 deaths on tonight's show. Tune in to see how close I come.

During the show, please post comments below if you want to add to the discussion.

---------
2:12am
Zero deaths so far. What is going on?
President Palmer is now running the country and still doing Allstate commercials. Amazing.
2:22am
Looks like they edited out the dance track from Marwan's tape, that is too bad.
Chloe liked killing that dude, Edgar better say "please" and "thank you" for the rest of the day.
2:24am
When attacking a Chinese consulate, why not call former president Clinton? He attacked a Chinese embassy in Yugoslavia.
No wonder so many moles get through security, the CTU agents are all too busy with these love triangles.
2:28am
The Chinese consulate has less security than your local Walgreens
2:35am
Assualt on the chinese consulate is over: 1 dead, 1 seriously wounded.
I am the walrus, Paul is dead....2 down, 15 to go to meet my prediction.
Just spotted a wookie (on a commercial of course)
2:40am
At least the Chinese translator is hot, Jack should jump on that action.
Jack making deals with terrorists? Shouldn't he be rubbing salt in his wounds and breaking fingers to get information?
2:50am
This whole hour is a waste. It looks like only 3 people are going to die, what a shame. The previews for this week made it look like non-stop shooting this episode. Instead it is like The Love Boat, but with guns and hot asian translators.
When Jack was sneaking around the Chinese consulate, it reminded me of Metal Gear...but with less killing.
2:55am
Jack is now a doctor. Unhook the wanker, save the Chinaman.
What balls! Jack finds the best way to weed out the competition for his girlfriend....kill her husband.
Lame ass attempt to save your girlfriend's husband. The least you could have done was broken a sweat.
Jack better hope the Chinese guy pulls through, otherwise he is going to have a harder time getting his lady back.
2:59....3:00am
-------------

(Hat tip to RTFR for joining me in blogging 24)

Summary: I was 15 deaths off the total I predicted (17). I thought they would let Chloe at a few more people, maybe even let Edgar hold a gun. Who would have thought that storming the Chinese consulate would have been easier than Paris Hilton? This was a lame episode, end of story.

Next week: "We could be at war with 1 billion chinese" - President Logan. "We could lose 10 million people" - President Palmer. Who is running this country?

Alliance Filthy Lie Assignment

New Filthy Lie Assignment:
Evil Glenn's Mother's Day

What will Evil Glenn be doing for Mother's Day? I was wondering just that while eating my Fruit Loops this morning, reading my copy of the Knoxville News Sentinel.

While flipping through the Living section, I noticed a wedding announcement for Evil Glenn. I cut it out and posted it below. The wedding will be Sunday, May 8th at Church Street Methodist Church in Knoxville. The announcement included something about polygamy and the sanctity of marriage. So congratulations to Glenn, his current wife, and his fiancé on their upcoming nuptials.