Wednesday, July 20, 2005

Alliance Humor Assignment

How can you tell if someone is a terrorist?

In last season's 24, Marwan (a global terrorist) was able to bring havoc to our nation from the comfort of his cubicle as his co-workers milled around. How did HR let that one slip? Jack and his backup were even able to move in with guns drawn, without out anyone noticing. Personally, I would take the rest of the day off if I saw famed terrorist hunter Jack Bauer in my office. For those of you who are not as perceptive, here's a helpful guide.

Top 10 Signs Your Co-worker Is a Terrorist
10. Emails a fatwa on the jammed 3rd floor printer
9. You notice his car has a “Suicide Bomber on Board” bumper sticker
8. The FBI caters your company picnic
7. For no apparent reason, suddenly blows himself up
6. Shows you a picture of their infant
5. Borrows $1 from you and tells you he will pay you back "big time"
4. Always wants you to try his wife's ricin-roni
3. Lets you know he dropped a "dirty bomb" in the men's room
2. HR announces that bulky bomb-belts violate corporate dress code

and the number 1 sign your co-worker is a terorrist:
1. They supported Marwan

Other Links
Basil has a guide to spotting terrorists
DB has a Top 10
TWC has a step-by-step guide
The Babaganoosh has more
There's One, Only! has some handy hints
(linked on OTB)