Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Alliance Humor Assignment

What would we do with the terrorist detainees if Dick Durbin got his wish and we shut down Gitmo?
(An Alliance Assignment
)


If Dick Durbin gets his wish, Gitmo will be no more. What should we do with the 500 or so terrorist detainees after we strip them of their air-conditioned beach-front resort? What do we do to all losers these days, put them on a reality show.


ABC has "Dancing with the Stars", where celebrities are teamed up with a professional dance partner as they train and then compete in front of a studio audience in a televised dance competition. To avoid claims of copying the Dancing theme, we would outsource the new show. India's Zee-TV has already produced a rip-off of "24" called Time Bomb, why not let them copy this format as well?

Zee-TV's "Dancing with the Detainees" will team up former blood-thirsty terrorists with professional dance partners. The detainees will have to shed some pounds, which they gained while rotting in a Nazi/Soviet/Khmer Rouge gulag. The teams will perform dances such as the ballroom waltz and the foxtrot in front of a live studio audience. Each week viewers have a chance to vote a couple off the show, the couple voted off will be beheaded at the end of the show.

Other Entries
Basil checks with someone who knows a little something about torture, Jack Bauer
Euphoric Reality has a few to choose from
TFS wants to put the detainees on ice

Six Meat Buffet has the solution